My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
