i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
