I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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