Your tits are I can't wait for
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize
