Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
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