Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
