oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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