please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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