Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
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