I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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