all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
