i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
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There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
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After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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