What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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