I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Reggie can tackle my bush.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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