He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Randomize
