he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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