so that wasnt chicken after all
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I have feelings that need drinking.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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