I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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