I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
