Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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