I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
