Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
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He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
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That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"