similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.