yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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