Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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