I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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