She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
