I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Randomize
