I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Randomize