im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
