took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
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