I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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