My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
