I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Randomize
