Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
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