12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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