: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
