Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize