Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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