hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
