I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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