There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Randomize
