make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
