What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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