The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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