With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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