is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize