is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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