She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
The ass gains better be worth it
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