my vag is so smooth its legendary
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Randomize
