we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
