Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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